Kids’ brains rewire at age 6 and again at age 12. Sometimes when you feel like they don’t see or hear what you say, it doesn’t mean they’re ignoring you – they just have a lot on their mind. They may be thinking about school, their favorite sport, or a friend’s birthday party..
They have different priorities, too, that’s why it’s hard for them to understand why they have to clean their room or take a bath at this minute. Try these effective tips to make your child listen to you:
Connect before speaking
If you need to get a message across, don’t start speaking unless you have your child’s attention. Otherwise, the message won’t come across, especially when he’s busy playing or doing something else. Don’t bark orders from across the room. Instead, try to connect with him first – if he’s playing, play with him for a little bit first before gently stating your message.
Remember, the more connected we feel to a person, the more we are open to their influence.
When you’ve said something twice already and your child isn’t responding, it means you don’t have his attention. Refrain from repeating yourself – you’ll just feel frustrated and angry. Go back to the first step and try connecting with him first.
The less words, the better
When you’re trying to give instructions, be sure to use only a few words. Be straight and direct so that your child will understand completely. If you use too many words, the more likely you’ll lose his interest and attention.
Put yourself in his shoes
Think of it this way – if you’re doing something you really enjoy and someone asks you to stop doing it to do something else that’s not particularly an interest to you, of course you won’t prioritize it. See it from his point of view. If he’s watching something, let him finish it first. When he’s done, he’s more likely to listen to you.
Watch your tone
If you keep raising your voice or barking orders, the more your child will try to ignore you. Nobody wants to be ordered around and be scolded all the time. In fact, this stimulates resistance. So be sure to keep your tone warm and your approach friendly. This way, you’ll get more positive results.
Follow these effective tips to make your child listen to you – and they’ll be all ears from now on!